28

To say that today, January 28th, is a significant day would be a vast understatement. Today marks one year since doctors found the blob in my dad’s head and one year since my dad and I wrote our first blog post titled “Tumor Humor”. Today marks one month since December 28th, 2013, the day of my dad’s “graduation” (if you will). And today has aptly been declared “Loren Nancarrow Day” in San Diego.

The number 28 has come to us recurrently this past year — which is fitting, really. In numerology, the number 28 creates the number 1 — if you believe in that sorta stuff (we certainly do).  Let me share with you a little bit about the number 1:

The 1 is a doer, a powerful force that produces results and does not allow anything or anyone to limit its’ potential. The 1 is always in the forefront: a spearpoint directing and leading others. The shape of the number 1, just like the shape of all other symbols, reflects its meaning; it walks upright with pride and purpose. Strong, determined, unwavering and with specific goals in mind, the 1 can turn dreams and ideas into reality. 

The 1 grows, transforms and improves in perpetuity, precisely the way Mother Nature does. After all, nature’s primal force and most basic building block is the number 1. Nature knows no mercy and its’ cruelty can be heartbreaking. However, it knows balance and gives life indiscriminately and without judgment. It is, if you haven’t guessed, the most masculine of all numbers. There is a certain quality, a sense of honor and responsibility that demands our respect, and it has a sense of justice that cannot be denied.

So, in honor of this 28th day, I went back through our blog and read each of my dad’s posts for the first time since we wrote them. I didn’t realize how hard it would be for me — but what I found, without a doubt, was worth finding. Here, on January 28th, are 28 memorable quotes from my dad that can teach us all a little something about living:

1. My strength will come from humor—not worry.

2. I find wonder in sunrises and sunsets, the relationship between a bee and a flower makes my eyes wide.

3. The workings of this world mystify me daily.

4. I’m not giving up and never will.

5. There is no time to dwell on the negative.

6. [Brain cancer]…is not something I asked for but I accept it and I see it as my latest journey. My senses are sharper, my appreciation is deeper and each experience holds more wonder.

7. I just want to offer a few words of encouragement:  If you ever find yourself suddenly faced with this seemingly torturous medical sentence—don’t sweat it. You can do this!

8. Get out there and speak truth to power. Our words and pictures are still the most powerful tool we have to make a difference.

9. I don’t know how this chapter of my life will end. I’m hopeful and I’m treating it much as I’ve treated other challenges in my life—with hard work where it’s needed and plenty of jokes where they’re not.

10. While I hate cancer, I’m so happy that it has given me a chance to learn from its’ survivors.

11.  Turns out I liked being informed of my statistical odds. I appreciate the sense of urgency it provides. It reminds me that there’s a lot of life left to live.

12. Everything seems new.

13. The moment I’m living in now is what I’ve got.

14.  I want keep this good feeling going.

15. I’m obsessed with having a good time.

16. Peace and compost, San Diego.

17. I’ve got man stuff to do—rattlesnakes to wrangle, fires to build and facial hair to grow.

18. No panicking allowed, these are the easy times.

19. I’m doing my best to remember that others have it far worse

20. If you’ve got cancer: DON’T FREAKING GIVE UP.

21. I’ve been so impressed by all of the survivors I’ve met in recent months. Thank you for teaching me how to be strong.

22. There’s something I’ve been feeling lately — it’s a feeling of inclusion, of belonging to a group of badass people fighting for their lives…I’m inspired by my teammates. I’m inspired their energy, their drive and their reluctance to give up.

23. I’m wishing strength for you in your own personal battles with illness and all of life’s other lemons.

24. As I transform from this world, I hope to be thrilled by what I experience next.

25. Now I’ve come to the next road in my journey, where I’m learning acceptance, and to be at peace with the understanding that my time is extremely limited.

26. Happiness lies in discovering your passions and exploring them fiercely…Wherever they are, whatever they may be, seek out your passions and cultivate them.

27. The most important lesson I’ve learned throughout all of this, is that it is far better to do good for others, than to do good for oneself.

28. I believe that life is energy and energy can neither be created nor destroyed, it can only change forms. And whatever form I take on next, I just hope my connection to those I love will remain.

Well Dad, I feel a connection to you whenever I look at the ocean or see a bird in flight. I feel a connection when I drive your car, when I take Django for a walk and when I wear your t-shirts to bed at night. I feel you in the kitchen, at our Starbucks down the street and every time I hear your favorite songs on the radio. And I certainly feel connected to you today.

HAPPY LOREN NANCARROW DAY, SAN DIEGO.

xoxo

Hannah Jane

Image

Hannah Jane Nancarrow is a San Diego State University alumni, with a B.A. in journalism and new media. After graduating in 2011, Hannah worked in local T.V. news before her dad was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. Hannah managed and contributed to her dad’s incredibly popular blog (thenancarrowproject.com) and social media platforms before he passed away, after 11 months of bravely battling and blogging. The diagnosis was a catalyst for her own writing and for following each whim and dream. Today, Hannah writes her own blog and has been a keynote speaker at San Diego Women's Week, Relay for Life, and a top fundraiser for cancer-related causes throughout San Diego. Hannah also has a passion for health and fitness, since losing 75 pounds in 2011. She earned her Spinning® and group fitness instructor certifications, and teaches weekly cycle classes in Encinitas, California. Hannah also earned her real estate license and works in the family business, Nancarrow Realty Group, in North County San Diego.

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101 comments on “28
  1. Jackie Owens says:

    Dear Hannah. You are something else. Your father’s daughter for sure. Face the facts and future with courage and humanity. Such a gutsy family. All of your dad’s fans and now ;yours commend you for your wonderful writings. Thank you for your wonderful insight to our future lives. Love the Loren Nancarrow day, a wonder tribute to a fellow who is greatly missed not only by family but his many fans and followers over the years. Keep writing, it helps not only you but those that love you and yours also. Jackie

  2. Linda says:

    Thank you. Your words mean a great deal.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Hannah, So beautifully written. I find myself rereading your blogs and gaining so much inspiration from each one. Loren will be missed by each and every San Diegan that “knew” him, either personally or on the news. What a lucky girl you are to have had him as your Dad.
    Happy Loren Nancarrow Day!
    Sharon Everingham

  4. Dee says:

    Happy Loren Nancarrow Day!! Thank you so much for posting your Dad’s quotes…so awesome and such a nice reminder of him. San Diego misses him, but we all have many special memories of that very special man!

  5. Nenette Popiela-West says:

    Wish you would consider writing a book about your dad. You can do it and you should. that would be your job Hannah! Best of luck to you and your family. Loren is so proud !♥

  6. Bobbie says:

    Dear Nancarrow family:
    It is the most beautiful January day to celebrate your father and husband! I attended the beach service for your father and took some sunset photos that evening. One of them is the background photo on my phone. The sunset that night was very simple in its presentation; the sun set slowly, the light ebbing away in its diffused brilliance. This is how I envisioned your dad’s passing, his light transforming into another type of brilliance in another place. In my mind that glow will never fade or truly go away. Thank you for writing today. Big hugs to you and your family always, and…….especially today!

  7. Jeannine Hillis says:

    I miss him too.

  8. Anonymous says:

    So sorry that your dad is gone…we all feel your pain…I am a San Diego native, and so loved watching your dad on television…such a kind, warm human being…

  9. Lois says:

    Thank you for reposting some of the best highlights of your dad’s blogs. #24 was when Loren wrote it, and especially now, one of my favorites of the collection. The way your dad courageously took on the fight against that enemy cancer, and rarely losing his sense of humor, was inspirational to all of us.

  10. Anonymous says:

    I have read shared and saved every blog from you and your family. Loved everyone of them. Leave the bench at the beach!

  11. celliott3657 says:

    Thanks again for allowing us to follow your dad through his journey. I know he is watching over you and your family and is enjoying his next adventure. Happy Loren Nancarrow Day to you and your family.

  12. Cheri says:

    I love you, Hannah. You know 28 is a VERY special number to me. XO

    • sandra mcnea says:

      i loved your father, Loren, for all that he taught me during the years i watched him. i know he was the real deal, honest and so funny, and full of love for our world. i miss him terribly and have prayed for your family. i understand the numerology aspect of 28-it is my birthdate. i also appreciate your honesty about the medicinal marijuana too-i am a 16 year breast cancer survivor, i don’t know you, but you must be your father’s daughter, as you have a gift in your writing, and i am sure he is so very proud of You. keep in touch, as i will follow. i plan to go get his books and continue learning from your wonderful Dad. so let us all celebrate today in honor of Loren Nancarrow. with love and prayers. sandy mcnea

  13. Hannah, you and your family have been truly blessed by your father. Loren was indeed a remarkable man. He took his lot in life and lived it to the fullest. I never knew him personally, but felt that he was a friend. Thank you for sharing these words again.

    Michael H Cienfuegos

  14. Cat says:

    Happy Day!!! This is great. I am notating my phone calendar to remind me of this each year. It will be a reminder to stop and think of him and all others who fought and fight each day. Might just head to Jake’s and have a Margarita and fish taco then watch the sun fall.

    Thanks for this past year Hannah, a true life lesson for all of us.

    Thankyou Loren; what a life, what a story, what the heck was that recipe for getting rid of ants?

  15. Linda Garnica says:

    So beautifully written Hannah. Your dad is surely smiling. I believe he sees this and feels your deep love for him. #26 and #27 🙂 What a wonderful man your dad was and what a wonderful family to carry on his legacy. May God give you peace and strength. You are amazing! With love and admiration, Linda Garnica.

  16. Bill Hirr says:

    Hannah,,,,ThanK yoU foR thiS…
    iT’s sOMethinG wE aLL aS HuMaNs shaLL gO Through tO sOMe eXtenT aNd youR Insight aNd ShaRiNg iS a TestimoNy tO boTh yoU aNd Loren..You boTh maKe/MaDe thE WorLd a BeTTeR PLaCe……[[[ foR oNe, i waiT PaTienTly oN The LORD tO JoiN LoreN aNd mY MoTheR iN ‘The SweeT bYe & ByE’===GOD BLeSS YoU + YoURs, TruLy

  17. Teri Shekell says:

    Hannah, you are carrying on for your dad. You have such inspirations and it sure shows in your writing. Please keep it up and most of us San Diegians really enjoy reading your blog. It give me and I’m sure alot of people an instie of the Nancarrows. We have been blessed by your family for many years and have watched your family grow through the years. GOD bless you and your family. I sure was very happy that San Diego named today as Loren Nancarrow Day. He definately deserves it. Santee proclaim a Lisa Hopewell Day for my very dear friend that passed away on Dec. 14th from Breast cancer. Heaven sure has some wonderful people there now.

  18. Lisa says:

    I love the Nancarrow family. Thank You. This blog has helped me more than you will ever know.

    God bless, and Godspeed on your journey ❤

  19. Anonymous says:

    Hang in there Hannah.Jane.

  20. Rhonda says:

    Hannah I hope you feel writing is your calling. Your love and respect for your dad is felt through your words. I was concerned that because he left us too soon that you and your family would be inconsolable, but seeing your mom and Britta dancing to Grahams music last night gave me peace knowing he really hasnt left us at all. ❤

  21. Joan Webb says:

    I never realized that you could miss someone that you never met personally. I do think of Loren often and especially when I am outside enjoying “his” beautiful San Diego countryside. for some reason I think of him when I see yellow butterflies. Sounds kind of silly , I guess, but maybe its because I was always wanted to ask him about them. God bless you and your family … you are truly blessed to have him as your father, husband and best friend. Special thoughts to you today on his special day
    Joan Webb

  22. Dawn says:

    Do keep writing Hannah . . .you are great at it and your dad, wherever he is watching over you, will keep urging you along as if he were still here. Your family gave the rest of us so much to be thankful for, whether we had cancer or other problems. Act not react is definitely the way to go on any given day. Keep it up. Love, Dawn

  23. NWJ says:

    Gosh I miss him….

  24. Phyllis Ramage says:

    Dear Hannah,
    Blessings to you as you have opened your heart to those around you. I see that the legacy that your father left you will inspire to you to do great things. May you always feel the hand of God upon you, guiding you, leading you in the way you should go.
    Love you,
    Phyllis

  25. Susan R. Wise says:

    Excellent Hannah of you to post these “awe-inspiring” Loren comments! I KNOW, dear Loren is truly at peace – but, certainly, not a sedantary peace. Can’t you, sweet Susie, handsome Graham and darling Britta just see him, “in his next space” with all of his enthusiasm, love & admiration for the Lord, plus, people in general and animals, “putting his best foot forward” to help one and all!! I daily pray for you dear Hannah & Susie, Graham & Britta to “forge ahead” – really hoping for the successful creation of the Loren Nancarrow roof-top Peace Garden. Hope to be able to contribute my small $$, very soon, to this wonderful cause/creation – in your Dad’s honor! Hope occasionally, you’ll continue your “blog comments” to allow, one and all to continue to stay somewhat close to the dear Nancarrow family!! Love, Hugs, Kisses & Prayers, Susan & Julian Wise

  26. Anne Slagill says:

    Thank you for sharing on this special day. Although we do not know each other I have followed your fathers path and am amazed at your families strengh. I continue to pray and am thinking pn this special day my pansies need to be weeded and I will remember.

  27. Thank you for this great blog, Hannah. Keep on writing, girl….you carry on your dad’s legacy of inspiration so beautifully! Some day, I hope we will all be able to say “Happy 28th”.

  28. Anonymous says:

    Special on every level. Still sending blessings for the journey. ❤

  29. hilofbeans says:

    Beautifully written, Hannah Jane. I have been a fan of Loren’s since I first moved to San Diego over 15 years ago, am a (breast) cancer warrior myself, and am a devoted follower of your family’s story. I was so deeply saddened by your family’s tremendous loss.

    I would like to commend you, Hannah, for your strength and composure during a time when both seem impossible. It took me a decade to finally wrench out the words to describe my own mother’s death from cancer at age 48 – and to this day, I cannot read what I wrote. It is too painful. To read it through your experience, however, is helpful and hopeful, and seems very personal.

    I offer my heartfelt condolences, praise and prayers to the entire Nancarrow family. May peace be with you.

  30. Christine says:

    Thank you, Hanna. As always, you and your family continue to touch my heart. Christine (and Nitro!).

  31. Hannah you too are a beautiful spirit just like you dad and mom. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings and your dad’s “28”. I know I will go back to them many times to help keep my mind and spirit in the right place. This is a very special and beautiful sunny day and I plan to get out in it to honor your dad on his special day of honor ♥

  32. Jill says:

    You are simply amazing, Hannah! I know that your Dad is looking down on you and just beaming from ear to ear with pride of what an amazing woman you have become! Enjoy the day!

  33. keefe says:

    Hannah…I love your Dad’s # 27 quote….going to paint it on the wall above my desk ….I am in Montana and was walking in the mountains this morn thinking your Dad would have loved it out here…keep writing…keep remembering…keep laughing….when I get back to the enciburbia I have something to drop off for your family…hope you can jump in the ocean today and swim with your dad….

  34. gmaj1939 says:

    Thank you so much for this reminder of how special your dad was, and will always be for thousands of other San Diegans.
    I am sad for his departure from such an loving family, but surely know he is at peace in the arms of Angels.
    Warm hugs…Judie

  35. SDZanos says:

    Thanks for this. Happy LN Day!

  36. Vicki Markley says:

    Hannah you are a continuing gift, to us, from your Dad. May you find peace from his love. Much joy and future happiness for you~

  37. Barbara Wilson says:

    I now live in Illinois but most of my life I was in San Diego. Growing up we always Loren Nancarrow and his daily insights and information were part of our lives. I kept up with his journey thru cancer and his strength and humor were beyond anything I have read. He is sorely missed and will be for a very long time but his legacy lives on. He was a wonderful husband, father and friend. Our prayers go out to your family but know that he is still with you in spirit and always will be.

  38. Anonymous says:

    Hannah, I was just telling my husband the other day how much your father is missed.
    Sending you lots of hugs for you and your family.
    donna~

  39. Thank you, Hannah, for this beautifully written piece. I know your dad is so proud of you as you continue to inspire us as he did. Marilyn Hyder

  40. Hannah You write so beautifully. From your heart and it shows. The best legacy that Loren could possibly leave is you and Susie continuing to live your lives in a way that honors all the many projects and ideals that Loren had. He’s still here inspiring us all. Evelyn Weidner

  41. foxtail56 says:

    Thanks for sharing once again kiddo. And may I say……what a beautiful day today for your Dad. I am smiling here as I recall the blubber story. I love it.

  42. Adeline says:

    It’s a beautiful day ~ It’s Loren Nancarrow Day! Thank you Nancarrows for the light that you have always and always will shine on us! Loren will always be an inspiration ~

  43. Jane Lenartz says:

    Your blogs have been inspiring. How eerie is the significance of the time frame. He was a truly mystical man

  44. Anonymous says:

    Oh Hannah…………………………………………….

  45. Jane Sparks says:

    Just beautiful. You all have taught us a huge lesson and I thank you for that! Peace and Love.

  46. Linda Gloria says:

    Loren was a true #1. I still think of him each & everyday & hope I get one more of his great blogs. Loren is SO proud of the family he left behind to carry out his work. God Bless all of you
    Love & Respect
    Linda

  47. Alberto D. says:

    Thanks for sharing. Your family is so strong and appreciate all the good posts.

  48. Brad Evarts says:

    From a Father of four (three daughters) this is so awesome. Thank you for sharing your Dads beautiful thoughts of what is truly important in life. Your Dad is proud and rocking out, promise!

  49. John E Flannery says:

    God Bless the Nancarrows and the vast amount of people that Loren touched. May the Good Lord shine a light on you, warm , like the evening sun. John E Flannery

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