Well here we are again. A smaller room this time but back to the hospital it is. Allow me just a moment to say: Damn! And things had been going so well.
Here’s the timeline:
January 27, 2013 — Discovered brain tumor.
January 31, 2013 — Surgery to remove bulk of tumor.
February 1, 2013 — Tumor whisked away to a pathologist’s office.
February 11, 2013 — Pathologist’s report not good. Grade III Anaplastic Astrocytoma (brain cancer).
In the following days all that medical jargon began sinking in. The message was loud and clear: shelf life diminished. Since then, we’ve had some awesome days. Bought an R.V. and have had lots of great beach nights with bonfires, music and the loves of my life. I also endured chemotherapy and radiation.
Here’s how we got to where we are today and this smaller hospital room: I just finished my first round of treatments last week. I was told to expect to feel crappy for a week or so after radiation. But what I was feeling brought crappiness to a whole new level. Couldn’t get out of bed, my supply of smart ass comebacks was running low and the right side of my body was getting noticeably worse in terms of numbness from head to toe. So last night, Susie and I showed up at the hospital again with our best Oliver Twist voices—“Can I have some more sir?”
I only expected to have an MRI and a return trip home. Instead, back upstairs and news that I’d be cut open again. The neurosurgeon tells us that some sort of fluid has replaced the tumor and needs to be removed and analyzed. So now they’re going in a second time to remove the latest intruder. The good news is that it will be quick—-and I’ll still be smarter than you (that’s for Kathleen Bade and Hal Clement).
So, this is going to go well and should only delay the start of our first big road trip by a couple of days. I’m looking forward to sharing some of my road stories on Fox 5 San Diego and I hope you’ll watch.
By the way, in an earlier post I mentioned my bad-ass Bond villain scar. Apparently, someone told the surgeon that I’m extremely vain. So, what I got instead was an artful and nearly invisible scar (even on a bald man). But in all seriousness, I have learned that so many of you are suffering with stuff I can’t even imagine. Illness. Loss of a child. Wondering how you’re going to take care of your family. And I’m beginning to understand that my list of troubles is small by comparison—but I’m with you. I write as therapy and I hope you too will find some small thing that will see you through the roughest times as well.
Thanks for being here during my rough times.
Loren
The Nancarrow Project 
Humor will be your Strength Loren. I know you’re. Not much for the prayers but that’s Ok
They help me feel better about the crap, and gives me hope that it’s all just a pot whole alone life’s path
Hugs Audrey ❤
Don’t ever undermine your troubles in light of others. Yes, most of us have our troubles too, and I think many people share to show you that you are not alone. Whatever each of us may be going through, it is serious for each and every one of us, and that includes you too. Keep writing your blog and keep us up to date. You have been such a fixture in my home for many years that it’s easy to forget we’ve never met, but we care for you and are thinking of you. Keep up the fight!
Wishing you wellness, blessings and happiness, Loren. I grew up watching you on the news, your love of community and the environment has always been inspirational and you are even more so now with your positive outlook in these times. Thank you and sending love and healing to you and your family.
loren.. we will be there for you as long as you need us to be.. and then some..
Sorry Loren…I’d be wary about going on a trip to long or to far from home and hospital. Hope you feel well enough to go and make a good memory.
OH …..BUMMER!!!! Ok, carry on & get that fun road trip going ! SD is cheering you on!!! We anxiously await your next blog . You don’t have to be so entertaining. We just want to know that you are getting better.
Bunches of support from a fellow organic gardener/florist!!! I’m with you too!
Hmmm…all I could think was “Damn, he really does something to improve that hospital gown!” I guess it is the smiling eyes that make you so handsome; that twinkle of humor always there in the worst of circumstances. Choo choo, my friend, choo choo– courtesy of The Little Engine That Could.
sending love, light and prayer.
I look forward to your sharing life with all of us daily (or almost daily). Love your bright outlook and keep on shining you light, you are one awesome dude.
1st I want to say “Man you look handsome bald” Wondering if Susie is somehow in a far reached way liking the new look…And keep sharing dear SD friend, cause by sharing with us we all take a little bit of that annoyance away feeling it in our hearts too, does that make any sense? Just saying each person that reads how your doing gets to also take some of that pain, some of the fear, some of the annoyance upon ourselves so you don’t have “ALL” of it…We all love you Loren, God speed this part too…and each part of this journey, Tracy (Momma of a Loren)
Rats!! A smaller room?!? Seems like the more you spend, your room should get bigger, huh?
I’m so sorry to hear about your set back but hopefully it will be just a glitch in your plans to hit the road. Such a great idea!! I’m thinking I’m going to copy you and do a road trip after I’m healed from my treatments and surgery.
Don’t you love it when folks say “but you look so good!” I guess it’s like Fernando says, “It’s better to look good than to feel good!” 😉
Keeping you in my thoughts….fight on, my (cancer) brother!!
Loren, i wish i had something inspirational to say, but the words aren’t coming. I do love your positive attitude so keep the “journal” going. You stand tall among the citizens of the world. God Bless
Lifting you up in prayer and positive thoughts! ❤
Hang in there Loren, I went for my oncologist checkup and blood work today. Always a nerve wracking day hoping for good news. I will keep you and your beautiful family in my prayers. Keep strong!
Loren: Are you only wearing blue nail polish on your fingernails? That’s it then! You need to have a pedicure and paint your toenails blue too. See, quick fix:). There’s a country western song out there that says, ” …..just breathe”. Extra hugs while you’re in the hospital.
Loren, I have a good feeling your shelf life is going to be AMPLIFIED. Have you named your RV yet? You will be in it listening to “ROCKING DOWN THE HIGHWAY” in no time with your “SUPERIOR IQ” :). Looking forward to reading about the road trip while praying for you and many others. Take good care my friend and lots of love to you and your wonderful family. Hugs….from Linda Garnica
Just keep swimming, keep swimming.
hey loren just sending you and yours love and support-looking forward to posts from the trip-
Loren, I pray for God to heal you and give you strength as you go through this journey.Thank you for writting your blog, it is very inspirational and brings me closer to the relization of how important God and Family is to me and how blessed I am.
Bless you and your family
Take care Loren and get out of that small room fast!!! I miss seeing you on the news!!!You are the best!Best Wishes and positive thoughts are being sent your way!we all care about you!! A garden and news fan!Susan H. Davis
Love and best wishes from a former San Diegan living in tiny Delta Utah. Swing by and visit on your road trip. We would love to meet you!!
Sending warm positive thoughts your way. Love your journal and the inspiration you give to others. Enjoy that road trip!!
Loren, I have a GBM so I know where your coming from. Just wanted you to know that by the end of the radiation and low dose temodar I was in a wheel chair. That was July 2011. I managed to walk the SD R&R half marathon summer 2012. It does get better. Hold fast.
Keep on writing…hang in there…you have love and support all around you! There are so many pulling for you and your family. Judy
Loren, I love reading your blog. If Hannah is helping I love that too.
Keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
I hope you are out soon enjoying your beautiful motor home..
Best of luck, you will beat this! Many thoughts and prayers go out to you Loren. You’re gonna kick cancers a$$! 🙂
Keep the faith…
Loren – You’ve inspired me. The name of my next band will be Bad-ass Bond Villain Scar. Haven’t decided if we’ll play bluegrass or heavy metal, but it won’t matter because we’ll have an awesome name. Thanks.
Never missed your weather reports but then lost touch. Now we will never miss saying prayers and wishing you well as you cope and struggle with illness. Know your road trip will be fantastic when it comes.
Best wishes, hope you’re back on the beach soon!
Hang in there, Loren. With so many positive thoughts and prayers out there for you, that cancer doesn’t stand a chance. Totally looking forward to your road trip stories!
Love your blog, your spirit and sense of humor, Loren! In my humble opinion, beach bonfires, music and love are the best medicine for your soul. Keep on keepin’ on!!!
He has Always been one of the good guys.
Hi Loren, my dad was recently diagnosed with stage 4 cancer at age 77. Your posts are very encouraging to me! I wish you all the best!
Bumping up the prayers a few notches for you!
Hang in there friend! Looking forward to hearing all about the road trips ahead 🙂
Holding you and your family up to the Lord. See you on the beach soon.
Loren, We are all pulling for you. Keep your positive outlook and in ten years you will look back at this as a bump in the road. San Diego loves you!!!!!!!!!!! God Bless.
Loren, you’re an isnpiration to all! As I told you before I grew up watching you on TV and you’ve become family. Keep the faith and keep on writing! My prayers are with you and your family.
Shelf life restored.
Okay then. I see that I have not put enough effort into my hopping-spinning-wretched-arms twirling-pill bug-stomping-compost on fire-get rid of cancer dance. I shall do a much better one tonight. And if they don’t feed you well, call and I’ll deliver one of my wickedgood pizzas! We love ya, Loren. Stare it down and kick it’s ass!
Love the idea of your dance –keep it going! I bet it will help Loren.
I know your not feeling well but you still have that look on your face……you look good and I love following your journal….you are the best
Get on the road and make memories to cherish…you got people to see and places to go…so go…and by all means take to road less traveled……………..
Best wishes, Loren! Thank you for sharing your therapeutic writings. I hope you will be able to go on your road trip!!
Chantal Saipe
Sent from my iPhone
My thoughts are with you and your family, Loren. Hope surgery goes well and you are able to take that road trip with only a small delay.
Still praying for you, Loren. Hang in there. You are an inspiration!
Loren
I have been in your shoes althought we all wear them differently. Your at the point I was when I was scared angry and confused. Thank goodness the feeling like crap helped to distract me from dwelling on all of that. It will get better, you will feel more like yourself. And your fear will go away. Positive vibes are being sent you way from someone who is ten years past where you are now.
This is a great inspirational post…it’s encouraging. Thank you for posting this for many people.
DUDE, YOU ROCK!!! YOU’RE AN INSPIRATION.
So much love and so many prayers going up for you. I will say that you are as handsome as ever and look terrific! Keeping positive thoughts. I believe in miracles!
Loren, I always look forward to your journal!! Keep on writing my friend , btw…. you have some pretty mad writing skills!!
Also, listen to music!! I know I don’t even have to say that because I already know you probably do!!!
XOXO