Tumor Humor

Image

I have a new “friend.” For the sake of this blog, its name is the “Blob.” He’s been with me for a while now, but I was just formally introduced to him when his picture appeared on an MRI Sunday night.

I have been getting goofy over the last couple years. Unexplained stuff, I could only explain by getting older: aches, pains, ringing in the ears and other assorted stuff that generally goes along with being over 40, as I am (first element of humor). Recently, it’s gotten worse. Add numb hands, feet and dropping stuff to the list of annoyances.

While shopping at the grocery store Sunday night I ran into a doctor friend, who asked me how I was doing. When I answered, no words came out. He got the picture. That conversation (or lack-thereof) led to a trip to an ICU (where I now have a super-secret pseudonym and password). That’s where I first met the “Blob.”

He’s plum-sized on the left frontal lobe. Poetic justice being what it is, this is the area of my brain that controls speech. So my new job may be as an ASL translator for important people, such as the popular band, Nickelback (second element of humor). But we’ll discuss job opportunities after I get this damn thing out of my head. That happens Thursday. They say it’ll take 5 hours. I work the night shift, so I see this as a nice little nap. When I wake up, we should know if it’s a good, bad or another type of “Blob” and what comes next.

Since we don’t know that stuff, it might be a good time to talk about all the possibilities. We’ve learned my doctor is the best there is. Listed as one of Oprah’s “Miracle Men” and has several 5-star yelp reviews. My buddy, Paul Ecke, stopped by and brought up a complication we hadn’t considered: my political leanings may change and I may wake up yelling “drill baby drill!” or finding wisdom in what Sarah Palin has to say. The point here is we’re entering territory about which I know little. Having my family and friends around me for the past two days has confirmed that my strength will come from humor—not worry.

Please think of me and the “blob” in happy terms, and as Paul also said “I’ll see you on the other side.” I’m pretty sure he meant the other side of the weekend.

Loren

ImageMy friend, Paul Ecke, me and the “Blob”

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371 comments on “Tumor Humor
  1. Ken says:

    The month of October has been designated as Domestic Violence Awareness Month. This month we honor the snigificant work that has been done to reduce domestic violence and recommit ourselves to its end.The following are events held by the YWCA Northeast Indiana in observation of DVAM (for more information or to participate, please contact Steve Miller at ):“Flowers on the River” is the opening event for Domestic Violence Awareness Month in October. Each flower thrown onto the river symbolizes a life that has been affected by domestic violence. Participants gather at the YWCA on Spy Run Avenue at 5:00 pm and walk together to the bridge at 5:15. (Monday, October 1, 2012)“Chalk it Up to Awareness” is an initiative of YWCA Northeast Indiana for which colleges or businesses use colored chalk to create sidewalk billboards to raise awareness about domestic violence. (October 8-12, 2012)The National and local goals of the “National Week Without Violence” is to create awareness, remember victims, and speak out against violence in all its forms. (October 15-19, 2012)In celebration of the National Week Without Violence, schools and libraries throughout the area will gather for “Peace Story Time”, to read stories about and educate children on domestic violence. (October 15-19, 2012)Presentation of YWCA Hope Awards: Each day this week, the YWCA Northeast Indiana will select and recognize a recipient from each of the five categories: Domestic Violence, Empowerment of Women, Racial Justice, Junior Hope Award, and Child Advocacy. (October 22-26, 2012)

  2. Dear Loren. My name is Loran. I’m a 55 year old guy. Please read this!!!! Alpha Lipoic Acid (ALA) IV’s may be your best chance. It is an antioxidant 1000 times more powerful than Vitamin C. It’s the only known substance that is both water and fatty tissue soluble. Because of this it can break through the Blood Brain Barrier (BBB). It was first studied in the ’90’s by a German University, then the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN in conjunction with a Russian clinic. My dad was a doctor at the Mayo Clinic and I was born there. They studied it first on neuropathy which I have a non-diabetic type. Their website said they were going to try it on HIV, MS…I read about this about 5 years ago. Both studies found a 59% decrease in pain and SOME REBUILDING OF THE CELLS. I went to the Whitaker Wellness Center in Newport Beach in ’09.. I had 2 IV’s a day (600ml ,400ml) for 13 days, My pain went down 90%. I recently read several cases where patients with pancreatic cancer were given only high doses of ALA and they have been cancer free. One was 78 months clear. Another I read was 48 months. It’s helped the symptoms of Alzheimer’s and MS. It was also given to older rats along with a placebo to other older rats and the rats with the ALA lived considerably longer. I don’t know if it could beat your “Blob” but you should investigate this further. Your news channel should investigate this too and report on it. Best of luck!!!! We all love you!!! 858-245-0185 if you have any other questions about it.

  3. Sharon Frank says:

    Dear Loren, It has been such a very long time since I sold you your GMC Yukon at Marvin K. Brown and I am an educator now, but I will never forget what a kind person you were to do business with. Your journalism is impressive and enlightened and I am confident that the Blob will not damper the amazing human being that you are! My thoughts and prayers are with you!

  4. Bob K says:

    Thanks for the heads up

  5. Cheryl says:

    Dear Loren,
    Hope you are having a wonderful day. I have known you for a long time, as a newsman. You always brought a smile to my face as well as my parents who watched you with your planting ideas.
    My husband and I ran into you and your beautiful dog at the Sprouts in Encinitas. You took time to talk to us and we really enjoyed our conversation. You were in no rush to leave and we stood there and talked for quite a while. You are a beautiful man inside and out. You can beat what you have. You are a strong person. My husband and I only wish the best for you and your family.
    Love and Well Wishes !!!!!!
    Jaime & Cheryl 🙂

  6. Phyllis Stookey says:

    Hello Loren,
    Jack brought me the news after speaking with KFMB friends this morning. You are one of the nicest people we know and you must recover! My brain tumor struck more than 5 years ago, treated with stereotactic radiation and spinal tap to reduce pressure. I’m still here and recovering more each day. You can beat this!

    love and good wishes, Phyllis and Jack Stookey

  7. Colleen Rentis says:

    Hey Loren, been watching you for years and have enjoyed you and your gardening tips. Hang in there, I know its so easy for someone to say and a lot harder for you to do. #1 thing that helps so much is your wonderful family who loves you dearly along with the rest of us out here in San Diego who do. Our thoughts and prayers are with you through this most difficult time. You will over come this. I just know it…

  8. Charlie Coulon says:

    Hang in there Loren, I have stage 3B liver cancer and was given 11 months to live, that was 28 months ago. Modern medicine is amazing, side effects come and they go, all that maters is your eyes flutter open every morning and you live you life to the fullest.
    Charlie

  9. Diane says:

    Hi Loren,
    Humor is really great medicine so please keep laughing and smiling. My husband was diagnosed with a GBM in 1998. Had no luck here in SD so we wernt to MD Anderson in Houston. The doctor is the best! World Reknown! As it goes with statistics we were only given a couple years max. Remember statistics are only stat’s. My husband lived happily for fourteen years with little deficit until the tumor returned, A miracle man some would say. My husband would say he was just lucky. We were both lucky..

  10. Jo Teevin says:

    Loren. hang in there buddy. you will make it . five years ago fathers day i got the same news, i had no idea anything was wrong. the day after i got home i got out in the yard and started digging in the dirt to take care of my garden. that is my therapy. and i thank you for the many great tip’s.may God shine his light on you and your family. jo teevin

  11. Joan Blumeyer says:

    Prayers and good wishes from that (older) lady who used to live in Olivenhain, jog with her daughters out Lone Jack, and reminded you of your mother-in-law. Very much enjoyed our occasional chats and think your horn and wave helped me along some of those jogs. I just turned 72, live in Ocean Hills Country Club now– “active retirement living” includes 4 1/2 mile walks, golf, swimming, bridge, more activities than are possible to pursue. Also good friends. You have many friends who have enjoyed your company, one way or another. Our family included.

  12. Neil Hokanson says:

    Hi Loren,

    You are a great guy and an inspiration to so many at so many levels. We are rooting for you to beat this thing so you can continue to inspire the rest of us to get more out of life.

    Cheers,

    Neil and Clarice Hokanson

  13. Joan Nelson says:

    Unlike many people who have left lovely sentiments i have never met you but have enjoyed watching you on TV over the years. My family in Escondido wishes you nothing but the best.

  14. Karen Thompson says:

    Hey Loren… Hang in there, baby!!! You will beat this. I’ m pulling for you. Robin Roberts made it back to her
    Chair and so will you!!! Keep smiling… Luv ya ❤

  15. David Ingalls says:

    Loren,
    It has been a long time since ENMU. Hope all goes well and you have a speedy recovery. I had my own blob about 3 years ago and so far all is well, I hope the same happens with you.
    Dave

  16. Janette Dorricott says:

    As a weatherman of San Diego, all you can say or eventually sign “sun” everyday. That’s what my former ASL student Hannah (your daughter) created her ASL video about your weatherman career. Thought it was funny. I still have her video clip. 🙂
    Speedy Recovery!

  17. Praying God’s Grace and healing for you dear one.

  18. Mark Walton says:

    Hey Loren—-
    I was just going through KPRI’s list of music trying to find some new tunes for my IPOD, when I came across this news about your brain tumor. Wow, I was stunned to say the least. Our family will be praying for you and your family. We know you can beat this thing because you have a lot of people behind you and you are a strong, positive person.
    Get well soon.
    Mark and Lynette Walton

  19. Lenda Dean says:

    Hoping all will be well…as Dame Julian of Norwich always said. Praued a lot yesterday. Tay optimistic..the most important thing!God Bless

  20. Adam Klarer says:

    Sending some strength your way Loren. One day at a time toward a complete recovery.

  21. Jan says:

    Hey again Loren! You know this is just another bump in the road that you can over come. I did 17 years ago. Dx with stg 4 ovarian cancer. Surgery and then chemo and ……here I am . No recurrence to date. We all have a story to tell . The humor helped me through my journey with it all Be well…….

  22. Linda Tegarden says:

    A friend of mine is a Martial Arts Master, an author and educator. His name is Jerry Fisher and this is what he posted on Facebook today…I knew about his cancer diagnoses and wanted to share with you what he shared with us…just in case:
    “After 4 1/2 years of stage 4 cancer in my liver, the portal vein to my heart and my brain ( a total of 8 cancers all “terminal”. I am still kicking and punching and teaching martial Arts 5 days a week. I give the credit to GOD and Dr. Patrick Linson at Cyberknife in Vista Calif. I will be doing some interviews with people for inclusion in scientific papers and journals. I t is somewhat of a Mir…acle….The “City of Hope ” gave up on me and told me I would be dead by Christmas of 2008.
    I am not taking any credtit for any of this , except for maybe turning it over to God and staying in tip top physical condition.
    I pass this on to all of you who have cancer or someone you care for has cancer. It doesnt have to be a death sentence! Dont give up, that what kills so many. Keep a positive attitude, stay as strong as you can and trust in God.
    I totally recommend the Cyberknife treatment. It is a relatively new form of laser like radiation and has kept me alive and strong for 4 1/2 years.

  23. Frank Fourneau says:

    I’ve always loved you on Channel 8 and Channel 10 News . Prayers and good thoughts for a speedy recovery.

  24. Isabella Breasted says:

    Hey Loren, I met you a couple of times down at Cardiff beach. As a photographer I have enjoye taking meny magical moments down by the bridge across from the campground. I have long enjoyed your work on TV. You are a special friend to many of us who don’t necessarily get to see you and speak to you in person every day. You and Susie and your family are in my prayers and heart. God is with you. I know that. God. Love, your Docs, your Family, and Our Love will get you through and help you heal.
    Sending my best wishes and love.
    Isabella

  25. Nancy Lord says:

    Love and prayers coming your way from Yorba Linda, CA….I’m friend with Pamela and Bruce Blair…..I was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer – my Christmas present December 2011. It was found by my dermatologist – a pink spot on my forearm which looked like a pencil eraser…the beast metastized on my arm. My docs at Hoag in Newport Beach have yet to find the adenocarcinoma constistant with cribriform carcinoma anywhere else in my body. I continue to be proactive in my healthcare – derm and blood tests every 3 months. This month marks one year from the initial testing progress..and I’m undergoing the same tests again this year….Faith is on your side – and you have an army of prayer warriors!!! Hang tough and NEGU…(never ever give up). Having a sense of humor is a wonderful tool….again…lots of love and prayers coming your way!
    Nancy

  26. Carol says:

    Love and prayers to you Loren, with blessed wishes for a speedy recovery.

  27. Felicia says:

    Love the humor! Believe in the humor. Humor is your friend. Best, Felicia in SD

  28. Katie Klarer says:

    Dear Loren,
    Though I only met you a few times, I was struck by what a kind and good-hearted person you were. I know you will get through this and my thoughts will be with you for a very speedy recovery.

  29. Jeremiah says:

    Hey Amigo,

    Wishing you a speedy recovery !

    Jeremiah Sullivan
    San Diego

  30. As a cancer survivor/thriver myself, I know that this is not a club we wanted to join. Membership requirements are quite a challenge. I’m visualizing you returning to good health following surgery Thursday. My prayers are with you and your family.

  31. Margo says:

    A fan! Humor wins! Good to go!!! Speedy Recovery and look forward to seeing you soon again on the teli.

  32. Susana Cuéllar says:

    If you had to get a brain tumor, you were born in the right time in history. Can you imagine this in the 1800s or any time earlier? You will survive and thrive after this. Medicine has come such a long way, we need to be grateful we live in these times.

  33. Barbara says:

    Let’s hope for a short and sweet party on Thursday.

  34. Loren,

    Positive thought abound, your support group of frineds and co workers speaks volumes for you !! Beat it, I know you will and be a better person for it. All our best, our thoughts and prayers to you Susie and the family. Our best Kevin & Debbie McCauley

  35. Chuck Colgan says:

    Loren – Wishing the best to you and your family; hoping for your speedy recovery. Hang in there, buddy! On-on!

  36. Jan says:

    Brightest blessings for your day Loren Be well.

  37. Bill and Mary Keane says:

    We are thinking of you and have all the hope for the best!

  38. Janie DeCelles says:

    Well, there’s clearly nothing wrong with you sense of humor! I had to “go under” about 25 years ago for a baseball sized tumor of unknown origin so I know the uncertainty of what that feels like. I’m so glad to know you’ve got a great team and lots of support and will be sending positive vibes your way!

  39. Linda says:

    Lauren,

    My husband was diagnosed with a brain tumor 3 years ago and is still doing well. You can beat this with all the new treatments that are out there now. He was very healthy and started having trouble similar to yours. Surgery and chemo have worked miracles. Stay positive you will overcome this. God bless you! All treatments were done at scripps la jolla. The best team of doctors.

  40. Steve says:

    Hey neighbor, hang in there we miss your smile and our morning conversation. Take care see you soon. The uruburus

  41. Janie Wright says:

    Staying positive seems to work as well as a keen sense of humor, of which you have both. Praying for a speedy recover

  42. Jim Kelly says:

    I’ve always loved you on the television….you will be back soon I am sure. Prayers and good thoughts are going out your way. See you soon on TV.

  43. JaneLaFazio says:

    Hey Loren! really sorry to hear this, but I’m really glad you got a diagnosis and surgery is planned. My husband, Don Strom, and I remember you well when you came to the San Diego Brain Injury Foundation http://www.sdbif.org/ event a number of years ago. (My husband had an aneurysm in the left side of his brain, that resulted in aphasia.) We send our positive thoughts and strength to you! xoxoxo

  44. Amy says:

    As a former ICU nurse at Scripps La Jolla, I know Dr Coufal very well and you’re in great hands. The SICU nurses are amazing people and will take great care of you.
    You were on our airplane to Maui about 4 years ago and offered to take my crying 8 month old baby on a walk around the plane. You and your wife are great people and I’m wishing you a speedy recovery.

  45. Jan says:

    Love the humor there Loren. Sending good positive thoughts to you and your family Been where you are 17 years ago. That is how long I have been a cancer survivor. Just wanted to share a bit. Be well…..

  46. caronstreet says:

    My uncle, Jerral Miles sure is right:we have a lot in common:except I am talkinG faster than ever. Surgery over right ear,,,didn’t even lose a lot of hair, and walked out three days after. just a started the targeted rad this past Tues..it takes fifteen minutes. I go to “BIG” Ochsner in New Orleans suburbs. You, and I need our humor, and whatever else we can dredge up. get ready:they give us all the same tiny steroid! And it makes u so hungry you might get up in the night to eat! so, eve tho I lost weight in Hosp..I was there two and 1/2 days while they mapped the brain and every neurosurgeon on the team had a look at me. I had a religious vision while in an mrimachine(an old one like a fire station). Mary, Jesus, and St. Bartholomew appeared to me..a very happy view, calm, reassuring..I know that quite a few people were very worried about the surgery, which I guess was several hours. Maybe five six till they got that d%^¥£) intubation tube out…that is the only thing I remember, and it made may whole chest hurt. byway, no worries. no kidding! I actually have to other family members…I have hundreds of relatives, and only half of them are Mileses(oddly enough, my son’s name is Miles(age30) Landry..he is a Cajun on his father’s side. he went to Brisbane, Aust in beginning of 2010 to attend new med school collaboration between Univ of Queensland..two years, then on to Ochsner for last two years..he has just begun last year. seems a little weird..he wanted to be a neurologist, but now seems to be leaning to surgery.By the by. st. Bart is the patron saint of all neurological diseases! anyway, I will pray for you and your recovery and add you to all the prayer lists. I am trying to follow a holistic “cancer fighter diet..and am. But boy is it hard to discontinue sugar..all sugar, all the carbs, like white flour, rice, etc. Eating lots of veg, flax seed, yogurt, veg, rd grapes,apples, tomatoes, a little very clean cold ocean fish (salmon, small, young, wild caught), carrots, before the treatments…lots of Vit. c, Vit E., Greens, llke Kale,cabbage. I can send you more on the diet..I actually knew about the diet before my surg., courtesy of an English sister in law…I am drinking wheat grass shots..can get them in Mandeville, La where I live and now we are growing our own and juicing it..even running it under ultraviolet light..don’t ask. Oh, and I have eaten wonderful oystErs…not raw..after B. surgery, consider your Immune system a little compromised..but I haven’t even had a headache…at all. my friends got real concerned when I dropped the two pumpkin pies on the doorstep,reamed out a friend at a mag Jong game, couldn’t buckle my seatbelt, And COULDN’d find my way out of a great consignment shop I go to all the time..they decided I must have had a stroke and made my husband Jerry take me to the e.r. Where one MRI showed what looked lke that oldad:this is your brain on drugs…just lke a fried egg above my right ear! My sug was Nov. 28. I do get fatigued, and don’t think I am u to practicing law now..I have had an extreme sug of creativity, and am writing lots of poetry..even in my head, in the hospital..which is I characteristic of me..I usually have a pen in my hand…now an iPad. Jerral, and his son David, and Jerral’s younger brother, Jim visited me within last two weeks..we had the best time..and Jerral took some of the best photos..New Orleans is on fire right now, what with Carnivalbeing interrupted by the Superbowl tomorrow..I have decided to support the Ravens..seem lke my kind of team..now the Saints, the Packers are out of it. we all hate Atlanta, so just glad they didn’t get in. who Dat Nation is wearing its black and glad and trying to be good hosts, so everyone has a great time…it is FUN. I am an Episcopalian, and have just ordered up a bracelet…med alert..but beautiful. Maybe I won’t need it, but as we say in NOlA (New Orleans, Louisiana)
    C’est la vie…just make sure you enjoy Lfe every day, and do something u love..hug somebody. will be praying. by the way..my surgeon was a guy Namew Bowie(actually, Bui, but pronounced just like a Bowie knife…next time I will tell u about that! Lenda
    Dean

  47. Geri Jones says:

    The jones family is sending you love and healing and a huge hug
    to all of you!!

  48. Cheryl Falk says:

    Hope all goes well with you. It is awesome to know you have a great doctor. A long time listener of yours., Love from the Falk family

  49. Lix Winter says:

    Hang in there weatherman!!, All the best wishes for you. Sending prayers your way.

  50. John Rohrbach says:

    Loren: Give me a call John 206 200 8911. An old neighbor It is important

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